• Mater

How to Wait for Your Husband (Before You've Met Him)

Updated: Sep 26, 2019

I talked a bit previously about why being single is not something we should be scared of. In fact, it is worlds better than being in a bad relationship. But, what do we do while we're waiting? Here I'm going to give you a short list of things you can be doing right now to prepare yourself to marriage...even if you don't know who you're going to be marrying!

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1. Live at home while working. This is a wildly unpopular idea, but hear me out. Think about all of the money you could save living at home with no rent, working during the day, and living frugally. You could knock out all of your debt before your wedding day. You could build up a nice nest egg for your husband, which I promise could be a huge blessing to your family one day. It could even mean you get to get married or buy your first house sooner!

2. Learn how to budget. Even if you don't end up being the one to balance the checkbook in your marriage, a vastly underrated gift you can give to your husband would be coming into your marriage with frugal habits. You can't imagine the shell shock it was to my system going from eating out for most meals when I was single to cooking and eating leftovers once we got married in order to save for our goals!

3. Learn how to keep house. Cooking, cleaning, sewing, gardening, and canning were not things I knew how to do before marriage. In fact, they weren't things I knew how to do well until our first child came. And let me tell you, that was a very hard learning curve, having to learn all of these new skills and learn how to take care of a tiny human! Whether you live at home or alone, you can start to teach yourself these skills now. They might even turn into hobbies you love, and there are few better things you can give to your new family than having productive hobbies!

4. Do works of charity that will be harder to do when married or with children. This is a great way to offer up your time of waiting to serve the poor and those in need. Plus, you can make good friendships (and perhaps meet your husband!) in certain volunteer groups, like those that pray in front of abortion mills, where virtuous men congregate.

5. Eat healthy and exercise. I let my healthy eating habits and exercise regimen slide during my senior year of college. So when I got my first job, I made sure that became a priority and part of my daily routine. I'm so glad I did! Between a busy engagement, wedding, getting pregnant immediately, enduring a very sickly pregnancy, moving into our first house, having a baby, and everything in between, I have never been able to get back to the routines I had when I was single. However, I'm so thankful I laid those foundations, because I made eating healthy a habit before marriage.

6. Attend daily Mass. Go as often as you can. Go to confession and adoration frequently, too. They are great ways to spend your time, and hey, you might meet your husband there like I did! I also didn't realize how difficult all of those things would be once I started having kids. Go now and enjoy the quiet time of prayer while you can!

7. Create a Rule of Life for yourself. Routine will help you so much, I promise!

8. Grow in virtue. I can't emphasize this enough. The best thing you can do for your future husband and children is to be virtuous. Start reading books like Introduction to the Devout Life, Three Ages of the Interior Life, The Ways of Mental Prayer, and Divine Intimacy. (The first two to learn how to ascend the levels of prayer/holiness, the third to learn how to do mental prayer, and the fourth for good meditations for mental prayer.) If you want to marry a virtuous husband (yes, you do, and here's why), you have to be virtuous yourself. Because guess what? A virtuous husband is looking for a virtuous wife!

Pray, hope, and don't worry, as St. Pio says. This time will pass. This time is a gift to you from God that you will never get back. Use it wisely!

To read our post on how be a traditional Catholic wife, click here!

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